new measurements and meat

I tried tofu today. I've been jonesing for BBQ, and Morning Star makes BBQ "riblets". So, instead of drinking BBQ sauce straight out of the bottle, I thought I'd try that. Because it's not the meat I missed, but the taste and flavor of BBQ.

It was good, and the texture was very meat-like. And I think that it being so meat-like is why I didn't care for it. Today marks the beginning of my eighth week of being a vegetarian and that turns out to be enough time to be weirded out by the texture of meat.

Seriously. Things I never thought I would say.

I probably won't continue to eat tofu. Like I said, it was good, but the texture was weird to me. I go 24 years munching down on some cows and chicken, but I go seven weeks without out and now it just seems strange to me. Which is good, I think. It means that I probably won't go back to my carnivorous ways.

Okay. This is a short entry because the Oscars are on and I'm totally occupied with that. But I'm throwing in my updated measurements. I have no idea what my weight is. Probably not good since I'm gaining muscle and I haven't eaten so well this past week.

Weight: ???

Left Arm: 12.1 (+.1 since February 15)
Bust: 39 (same)
Ribcage: 36.3 (-.7 since February 15)
Waist (at belly button): 37.6 (-.4 since February 15)
Hips: 42.2 (-.1 since February 15)
Left Leg: 21.8 (same)

Since July 28, 2o10, I have lost 14.3 inches off my body. Which is pretty friggin sweet. In the past 12 days, I have lost one full inch. And a shirt I bought on Black Friday that was way too small that I forgot to return now fits. Which makes me happy. About as happy as me seeing James Franco in Marilyn drag.

girl scout cookies, bones, and instant gratification.

It's pretty awesome that I've lost an inch or so off my ribcage and, in so doing, my boobs look bigger.

Whatever, okay. I've always had self-esteem issues when it comes to that particular area. You would think that it would only be fair that, if I was chunky that I should at least have cleavage. I mean, boobs are fat and I've always had plenty of that to go around. Even in a good push-up bra, I still struggle to fill out a t-shirt.

In other times when I've lost weight, the first place for it to disappear from has been my chest. I don't know exactly what's different this time. I guess because I'm focused more on working out than eating healthy? Because I've certainly downed my fair share of Girl Scout Cookies in the past few days. But, honestly, how are you not going to eat Samoas? They're delicious... and I ordered them months ago. Long before this whole "I'm going to lose weight and be skinny and hot forever" thing. And whatever. Even I was trying to lose weight before, I still would have bought a box (or two) of those delicious little cookies covered in caramel and coconut.... why is that box in my desk at work? I could eat the rest of that box right now without any sense of regret.

I had a point to this. I wonder what it was. I'm such a horrible weight-loss blogger that I start talking about Girl Scout cookies and lose all train of thought.

Oh, right. Losing inches off my ribcage. I can actually feel the bones in my ribcage now. Like, not in a disturbing "oh, that girl really needs to eat a zebra" kind of way, but in an "oh, good to know something's holding my organs in place" kind of way. I'm also able to see my collar bone more clearly now. Nothing incredibly pronounced, but it's so neat to see. I'm writing this mostly to convince myself that I'm not heading down a dangerous slope. I don't think I am. I'm just so happy to be seeing results. I'm such a fiend for instant gratification, and to be able to see changes in my body this soon makes me so friggin' excited. I've given up on so many "diets" and exercise programs because I didn't see results quickly enough. I really wish I had been measuring myself then. I bet that would have kept me on board longer.

Seriously. If you're just starting out with a diet or exercise plan, keep a measurement log. I haven't exactly seen the pounds melt off (maybe 4 to 5 pounds in the past two months), but I've lost probably two inches off my body in that amount of time. And, yeah, that's .2 inches here and .4 inches here, but that shit adds up. And, quite frankly, it makes me feel like I've accomplished something.

I realize that this would be the perfect time to update my weight and measurements but since 1) I forgot to weigh at the gym tonight and 2) I'm on my period and totally bloated, it's not going to happen. Maybe by the next post... but I wouldn't be surprised if I gained an inch or so because those Girl Scout cookies aren't going to eat themselves, you know.

roses are red, violets are blue, i'm at the gym on valentine's day - boo-hoo.

That's right. I hauled my carcass to the gym with B. On Valentine's Day.

This whole getting healthy thing is ridiculous.

I didn't weigh at the gym, and I'll measure tomorrow, but I know it's going to be bad news bears. See, during the weekend, I ate like hell. This is a problem I have most weekends. During the week, I can usually reign in my eating, and munch on some Subway and whatnot. Plus I'm at work for 8 hours a day and, even though people are always bringing in donuts and cake (not complaining), I still don't really snack there that much, and not as much as I do at my place on weekends.

Plus, on weekends, I tend to go out drinking at least one night. Which usually turns into eating pineapple pizza at 2 in the morning. And it's not that I'm complaining, because this is pretty much tradition and I enjoy it. But it's not just that on weekends. It's a lot of being lazy, eating chips and just zoning out in front of the TV. We'll ignore the fact that there is an elliptical machine less than two feet away from the couch. And if I'm not doing that, I'm out with friends and when everyone else is getting something delicious and greasy, you honestly think I'm going to sit there with a spinach and strawberry salad? To coin a phrase from Whitney Houston: Hell to the no.

And this is part of the reason why I've always failed at diets. When it comes to food, structure is not my thing. Also, I'm like a little kid. If I'm counting calories or points, the minute I reach the limit, I immediately want everything. Which is why I failed at Weight Watchers a few years back. I know some people can count calories and points and it works for them and that's wonderful. But it's not for me. I'm much better off with just attempting to watch what I eat. I may not always do the best, but I definitely don't get that panicky feeling of "holy shit, I can't eat anything else today".

What about you? How do you handle weekends? Or do you behave and not down Oreos and vodka?

the weight room.

I've read that men tend to lose weight faster than women because they're more likely to mix resistance training/weight lifting/whatever in with cardio than women. Plus I think they have higher metabolisms. Also it is so unfair that dudes can drop weight so easily. I mean, they can pee standing up. Isn't that enough? Honestly.

Since I've been hitting the gym with my friend B, who is a dude, I've started using a few of the resistance machines in the in-between weight room. See, at they gym I go to, it's three separate rooms, all mushed together like a shotgun house. When you first enter, it's the weight room with the dumbbells and machines that look like modern renditions of medieval torture devices, then it goes into a section of more modest gym equipment. An ab machine and some machines for arms and legs. I know I'm going against my gender and offending dudes that use these machines when I refer to them as gym equipment suited for women. I know that's wrong, but I know that I prefer these machines just because they're less intimidating than the stuff in the other weight room. After the modest weight room, the cardio machines- treadmills, ellipticals, that kind of thing.

B and I just renewed our gym membership to include the weight room. We had been trying a few of the machines in the modest weight room already, but now we're actually allowed to use them. Heh.

Yesterday, B breezed right past the modest weight room and into the main weight room. The weight room that I keep trying really hard not to describe as douchey. It's just that... and there may be a perfectly good reason for this (other than vanity)... but why are there mirrors all over that room? Is it really necessary to watch your muscles jump about as you lift dumbbells? Maybe you're supposed to be watching your poise or form or whatever. I don't know. But someone, please, make this whole thing seem less douchey to me.

I joined B in the main weight room because I'm insane. And I got stared at by every dude in there. Only because 1) I was the only girl there and beggars can't be choosers, and 2) me trying to use any of the machines is quite a comical spectacle to witness. I'm sure they all got a good kick out of it. The douchey bastards.

Only they're not really douchey bastards, because I was laughing at the ridiculousness of it all too. That, and the fact that I have zero body strength. Seriously. It's kind of pathetic. And it's important to make other people smile and laugh and whatnot.

This was my only outing to the gym this week. With the bad weather (Kentucky does not handle 4 inches of snow well) and me being so damn exhausted for part of the week, it just didn't happen. I've also eaten like hell this week. Once again, I blame the weather and me being so tired. But when I stepped on the scale yesterday, I had only gained .1 pound. And I measured the other day and have lost .5 inches off my ribcage, which just leads me to wonder how much back-fat I have/had going on back there. That's an inch off my ribcage since January 11. Which is awesome, but... damn.

Anyway. How is your February going?

bra size or bust

I had my first real bra fitting around a year ago at my local Victoria's Secret. It all came about after one of my roommates got a bra fitting there and discovered that she had been wearing the wrong bra size, and her new bra size meant a smaller band and larger cup size.

Naturally, I had to go find out if I had been wearing the wrong size bra. I've always had a difficult time shopping for bras since I'm a large frame chubby girl with no boobs. Maybe I had been searching for the wrong bra size all my life and this trip to Victoria's Secret would end my bra shopping woes once and for all.

Leave it to me to be in that little percentile of women who are actually wearing their correct bra size. I have never been so annoyed to be right in all my life. But there it was, a 38B. What I've been wearing since puberty. Dammit.

It was an older lady that done my bra fitting. She pointed out a few different bras for me and said that, because they ran small, I could buy some bra extenders.

Yeah, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to drop $40 on a cute hot pink bra and then clip on some nude colored bra extenders to the back of it. That's real cute. And it doesn't even matter that I'm the only one seeing that. It completely defeats the purpose of buying a cute bra.

And when you are one of the biggest bra retailers in the United States, it's really ridiculous to only have bra sizes up to 40DD... and that's not true for all their different kinds of bras. Their miraculous push-up bra only goes to a 38DD.

I'm just now able to go in there and buy a bra from them without extenders (what what!), but I'm still sickened by the fact that they don't cater to a larger demographic. Victoria's Secret is all about making women feel sexy and confident of their bodies, but when you go in a store that doesn't even MAKE your size in their most popular item, I know that I can't help but feel like a fat lard. Not everyone is supposed to look like their models. Some of us are large-framed, some of us have no curves, some of us really like carbs.

And I know other stores carry bras in an array of sizes, but I just can't get over the fact that a lingerie store noted for it's great selection of bras stops the buck at a band size of 40, at best.

I don't really know what the point of this post is. Mostly it's to congratulate myself on losing half an inch on my ribcage. But it's also a cry out to stores like Victoria's Secret to think about its consumers. If you want to make shoppers happy and have them return to your store, start stocking items the average women can wear. The average woman who is 5'4 and wears a size 12-14. I'm pretty sure your models aren't that size.

And since I don't feel like adding another entry just to post my latest measurements, here they are:

Weight: I've switched to the digital scale this week, so my weight's gone up from what the rusty old school doctor's office scale said, but it's also gone down from the last time I stepped on the digital scale, from 191 to 188.7

Height: 5'6

Left Arm: 12.1 (-.4 since January 11)
Bust: 39 (same)
Ribcage: 37 (-.5 since January 11)
Waist (at belly button): 38.2 (.3 since January 11)
Hips: 42.3 (-.2 since January 11)
Left Leg: 22. 1 (same)

So, since July 28 of last year, I have lost 12.6 inches off my body... and then some since I've only been measuring my left arm and left leg. Maybe I should start measuring my right arm and right leg too, just to feel more accomplished. Hmm....

veggie tales

Yesterday marked my fourth week into vegetarianism. Also, I still can't spell vegetarianism without sounding it out slowly and narrowing my eyes at the screen while I type. Because, you know, making weird faces makes spelling easier.

So why did I cut meat out from my diet? Well, except for fish. I was raised Catholic, and joke that I'm too Catholic to give up fish. Plus I really like sushi. Not that this matters because I haven't had fish either. My reasons for going vegetarian have been slowly growing the longer I continue on this little journey.

It all started when my friend B gave up meat and dropped 5 pounds in, like, a week. Naturally, I jumped on this wagon for two reasons.

1) I wanted to lose 5 pounds.
2) I viewed it as a challenge. Psh, if B can give up meat for a week, so can I. I will totally win this contest that I created in my head.

A week went by and I didn't lose any weight. I summed up B's weight loss to the fact that he's a boy and they lose weight easier than girls. That, or he's the devil. It's definitely one of those two things. Regardless of not dropping a measly pound, I decided to keep it up because

3) B was still not eating meat, and I'll be damned if I let him win.
4) I wasn't missing chicken or beef or bacon or anything, so why not?
5) I was finding new foods I enjoyed (like artichoke hearts), and it was fun ordering new things from the same old restaurants.

Last week was my toughest week of this whole vegetarian thing, and I imagine that one week a month will go about the same way. I've been taking a multivitamin every day... okay, fine. I've been taking a multivitamin nearly every day; I keep forgetting. My body was craving protein and iron. So I went up to the food court on campus (I work on a college campus, so I always have plenty of food options), and got some veggie nachos with pinto beans and was good as new. Which brings me to reason

6) I'm learning how to listen to my body.

Which is so important, you know? And I know that that sounds kind of hippie-dippie, but it's something I've never really thought about before. I'm realizing now when I'm hungry versus when I'm thirsty, and when I need certain nutrients. And since I'm on my hippie eco-friendly, free-trade all-natural soap box (I'm not making fun, since I'm a huge fan of eco-friendly free trade all-natural soaps), here are my other reasons for going down the veggie path:

7) The treatment of animals can be horrible and cruel. Not all places treat the animals inhumanly. I've lived on a cattle farm, and the cows have plenty of room to roam and be free and all of that. But I hate thinking about the ways some animals are housed and killed. And if me not eating meat can help a chicken or pig, then I'm all for it.
8) All the crap they inject in animals - the hormones and all of that? Fuck that noise. I like not having chemicals go into my body. Well, except for Diet Coke. But you get my drift.
9) B is still going strong on the vegetarian front and, like I said, I'll be damned if I let him win this one.

i be up in the gym workin' on my fitness

I'm actually looking forward to going to the gym tonight.

What kind of monster am I becoming???